when i was in the adolescence psych ward the group therapist used me as an example of what happens if you dont get self esteem.
[ding dong, ding dong]
Hello, sir and/or madam! Have you heard the good news?
hey… u know chILDRENS SHOW from u chidldhood??? well…. in reality…. it show about person in a COMA!! or AUSTISTCI!! or dead…!! prugatory!!! or crazy!!!!!!! whoa… pretty fgrimdark and gritty huH??? yeah…….
10000000000000000 notes to the tune of ‘whoa so cool’ ‘CHILDHOOD RUINED’ ‘omg i cant believe this!!!!!’
this cow is prettier than me
Dude someone once told me I look like a cow and I was like “omg really? Have you seen cows? Because I have and they’re fucking gorgeous and adorable, so thanks”
Fun fact: “cow-eyed” was often used to describe Hera’s beauty since the Athenians considered cows faces so beautiful.
I m fucking nausea my sis got me mill
I have arrived in hell.
I WILL BUY ALL OF THIS WHEN I GET MY OWN PLACE. I WILL PERSONALLY BUY EVERY BETTY CROCKER BRAND ITEM KNOWN TO MANKIND AND USE IT IN THE KITCHEN. AND THEN FIFTEEN YEARS FROM NOW I WILL INVITE FRIENDS OVER FOR DINNER AND EVERYONE WILL BE LIKE “oh how cute and quirky Betty Crocker” AND ONE FRIEND, JUST ONE, WILL HAVE A HORRIFIED LOOK ON HER FACE POORLY HIDDEN WITH A FAKE SMILE AND HALFHEARTED CHUCKLE AND I WILL LOOK AT HER AND POINT AND SQUINT UNTIL EVERYONE SHUTS UP AND I WILL SLOWLY WALK TO HER AND GET ON MY KNEES AND GRAB HER HANDS IN MINE AND LEAN IN VERY CLOSE AND SAY “I warned you about stairs bro” AND WE WILL BOTH BURST INTO TEARS AND REMEMBER THE OLDEN DAYS WHILE ALL OUR OTHER FRIENDS WILL WATCH IN CONFUSION